No one likes it when a guy plays hot and cold.
When you’re out together, he’s all over you. Holding your hand, telling you sweet nothings, making you feel like this is really going somewhere. So you go back to his place because what’s the harm, you’re practically a couple anyway, right?
Then the next day – nothing. No texts, no calls, not even a blue tick when you whatsapp hi.
So you sit staring at his online status, praying to see Typing come under his name, racking your brain over what you did wrong.
But is that really true? Well the answer is, probably not.
“Men Don’t Lie”
Not intentionally anyway.
You may just be the victim of what we’re going to call The Girlfriend Experience.
Because when that guy last night was holding your hand and being all affectionate with you, right there in the moment, he did believe it. He enjoyed being in a couple with you. He liked doing couply things.
If you could have strapped him down to a lie detector to see if he was faking, he would have passed with flying colours.
The problem is that he doesn’t see you as a long-term girlfriend. In the long run, he wants to be with someone else.
He wanted to experience a night of coupledom with you to cure his own loneliness. Maybe that’s selfish, but aren’t we all a little selfish sometimes?
So how do you stop being the victim of The Girlfriend Experience?
“Make him earn you”
If all he wants is a night off from single life before going back on the hunt, then don’t just give him what he wants.
Don’t be the girl who accepts a date the same day. Don’t be the girl who is happy going to the pub near to his flat.
I’m not saying become a nightmare – dating is meant to be fun after all. But test whether the guy is willing to invest in you because if he doesn’t think you’re worth making an effort for, he never will.
Paul is a business and political entrepreneur